Most of the cynics would tell you that marriages are made only for the purpose that you dont die alone, that you have someone to hold your hand as you waste the last years of your life, crying and begging for forgiveness and scared of the next world.
The romantics will hate to admit it but their reasoning is also very much along the same lines. They believe that marriages are a match made in heaven, so that we may all have the one with whom to grow old with and to spend our time with, and have that one perfect soul who is to be our support for ever and ever.. in this world.
But the reality in itself can be very different and mind boggling… The idea had always fascinated me to see how this generation of today would age.. how would they deal with getting old .. and not being able to wear their stilettos and go out clubbing anymore.. how would they be dealing with the hard arches of aging?
And lucky me, get to witness that in my very own home nowadays.. now my parents don’t belong to this latest line of hip generation.. But they are pretty modern from the Pakistani standard of Parents..
It feels like as they grow old they have become so rigid in their ideas and ways that marriage only seems to be coming in their way. Now I thought that maybe this is a rare disorder and i m the only one suffering from it.. but HELLO.. so not the case..
My friends today were quick to point out that they have been through the same hell as their parents got old.. how the mood swings and menopause and everything played a good role in playing with the sanity of their minds and the peace of their home..
This bothers me .. A LOT.. i have grown up seeing them together.. i have quoted their relationship and how I would want that for me and this is what I get to witness as they reach the end of the tunnel .. Isn’t getting old about being comfortable with each other .. about knowing each other so well that you can read each others mind and finish each other sentences .. or is it about finally getting to realize that you have simply lived with the wrong man all this time?
I used to be on the read at times.. and you had these couples in the car going by you.. and they never used to be facing each other.. but looking out of the windows or lost in their own thoughts.. and i used to think.. i never want to end up like that.. i want to have it like my parents have it.. always having something to talk about with each other.. from politics, religion, latest news, personal happenings.. they used to share everything with each other.. And now their lives are full of not secrecy.. they don’t talk any more much.. and they definitely don’t share what is happening in their lives with each other.
And in this post modern world, where each day makes us more and more independent.. as we find more and more ways to live our own lives without any hassle from any one else, .. in a world where divorces are happening just because your spouse snores, you really wonder.. if the sanctity of marriage will be able to survive?
Should we start embracing ourselves too for a partner that might not be able to understand us as time passes because they just don’t have the time or won’t bear us just because of an annoying habit he can’t take anymore? Should we prepare ourselves where love can only be given a day to celebrate, while the rest are pre-reserved for work and world affairs? Or should i just accept that this is the way the cookie crumbles?